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Recent Articles
Questioning the CIB, Brizzi and 'The Bachelor'
March 16, 2009
All right, class, put a fresh point on those No. 2 Dixon Ticonderogas, because here it comes, the News Quiz.
MoreQuestioning Obama, Favre and the CIB's $50 million
February 16, 2009
It's the season for bailouts—banks, businesses, capital improvement boards are all standing on street corners shaking
empty Burger King cups at passing taxpayers.
MoreSharpen your #2 pencil-it's Redmond's news quiz
January 19, 2009
Welcome to the news quiz. Each month in this space, I'll ask questions based on recent news events, and give you four answers
to choose from. Some of
the
answers will be fake; at least one will be real ... and correct.
MoreComputers may be sensible, but consumers manipulate them in weird ways
November 17, 2008
Computers are sensible, but humans using computers are anything but.
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: The art of letter writing: before the text generation
October 20, 2008
My sister's kids, Deniece and Denephew, think it is just hilarious to watch their fumbling uncle trying to send a text message-which
has recently become the No. 1 use of cell phones, instead of talking. I poke and prod one measly letter at a time. Meanwhile,
the kids-with agile thumbs and secondnature knowledge of a cell phone touch pad-are incredible. To watch them is to see an
intricate ballet of the opposable digits (pas de pouces) performed at lightning speed....
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: This election goes beyond just boxers or briefs
September 15, 2008
Now that those Laff Riot nominating conventions are over, the major political parties can get down to the serious work of
promising to change things by campaigning pretty much the way they always have. Wait. I take that back. I have seen something
different about this year's presidential election campaign, and I don't mean the obvious stuff, like John McCain and Joe Biden
being (and I can't believe no one has pointed this out) white guys. This is the first...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Wrap-master Redmond on Reynolds e-mail
August 18, 2008
I suppose you got the e-mail about Reynolds Wrap. Oh. Well, then, you're among the few Amer icans who didn't Actually, you
might want to check your e mail after you finish reading IBJ. It'll probably be waiting in your in-box Although I guess you
really won't have to, seeing as how I'm going to go ahead and spoil the surprise. Under a subject line full of typical Internet
understatement ("OMG! THIS IS SO AMAZING! YOU HAVE TO SEE THIS!")...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Wrap-master Redmond on Reynolds e-mail
August 18, 2008
I suppose you got the e-mail about Reynolds Wrap. Oh. Well, then, you're among the few Amer icans who didn't Actually, you
might want to check your e mail after you finish reading IBJ. It'll probably be waiting in your in-box Although I guess you
really won't have to, seeing as how I'm going to go ahead and spoil the surprise. Under a subject line full of typical Internet
understatement ("OMG! THIS IS SO AMAZING! YOU HAVE TO SEE THIS!")...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: You'll know really bad drivers when you see them
July 21, 2008
A reader recently forwarded an e-mail ranking the worst American drivers by city, along with the suggestion "Make fun of this."
While I usually don't respond to such directives, this case was different, seeing as how it came from my mother. You know
how it is. Anyway, here we go-a column about the worst drivers in America, as ranked by a well-known insurance company and
recommended by Mom. The Top 10 "Where-Did-These-People-Get-Their-Licenses?" cities are: Columbia, S.C.; St. Louis, Mo.; Greensboro,...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: A farewell to fairways: Why I'm retiring from golf
June 16, 2008
More than once I've been told that to get ahead in business, I need to play golf. Sorry. Not going to happen. Oh, it isn't
because I don't like golf. Quite the contrary. I love golf. Golf, properly done, can be beautiful: the ballet of the swing;
the crack of the driver against the teed ball; the drive rocketing away from the tee box, curving to the right and then drawing
itself back onto the fairway; a laser-guided short iron...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Begging for a Super Bowl: The ego and the bid
May 19, 2008
And so another Indianapolis Super Duper Bowl offering is in the hands of the immortals, also known as the NFL owners, delivered
there by scrubbed, shining, briefcase-toting eighth graders. Now we know how far some adults will go to avoid rejection. The
kids were chosen for this mission to, in the words of the organizers, show that the entire community wants to host the 2012
Championship of the World (Not Including All The Countries Outside The United States.) What a...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Wing and a prayer: Surviving today's air travel
April 21, 2008
One of the great struggles of the day-Airlines vs. Human Beings-has taken some interesting turns lately, but the score remains
the same as it has been for years: The human beings are not winning. Consider these touchdowns, so to speak, just from the
last couple of weeks: A piece of a wing detaches itself from a US Airways jet and smacks into several of the plane's windows
before falling to the ground somewhere in Maryland. "May I have your attention,...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: One paper goes Britney-free-it's a darn good start
March 17, 2008
With the possible exception of the people who run this newspaper and either allow me to write for it or haven't noticed that
I do, David Little is the greatest newspaperman in America today. Little is the editor of the Chico (Calif.) Enterprise-Record,
who declared his paper a Britney-free publication-No Spears, None Of The Time. He wrote in his column: "This is a woman who
seems to have mental health issues, shall we say. We'd never make light of a...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Oklahoma has a state meal. What about Indiana?
January 21, 2008
I hate to be the bearer of news like t h i s - e s p e c i a l l y when the legislators are in town and looking for ways to
distract themselves from having to make real decisions-but Our Beloved Indiana is falling behind at least one other state.
We don't have a state meal. We have a state bird (cardinal, same as 35 or 40 other states). We have a state rock (limestone-what
else?)....
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: 'Twas the office pitch-in before Christmas
December 17, 2007
I love this time of year ... the lights, the music, the hustle and bustle of shoppers rushing from optometrist to optometrist
trying to use up their flex spending money before the year runs out. And then there are the holiday greetings. How meaningful
and thoughtful they are, especially the ones that begin, "Due to lower-than-expected performance in the first three quarters,
the traditional holiday bonus will this year be replaced with the enclosed certificate good for 50 percent off...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Pushing my luck with two good trips to the BMV
November 19, 2007
Like a lot of people-which is to say, most Indiana residents-I have long greeted going to the license bureau with the enthusiasm
customarily reserved for dental surgery. The difference, of course, is that you get drugs for your root canal, but not even
a double helping of nitrous oxide could make a fun afternoon out of getting new license plates. Well, hold on to your hats.
I had to go to the license bureau twice last month, once for a...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Survey says: I think I'm still in seventh grade
October 15, 2007
Goof that I am, I joined one of those social network Websites, Face Space or something, thinking it might help me get a little
speaking or entertaining business. What I have gotten instead are surveys, lots and lots of surveys. And I use the term loosely.
Most surveys in which I've participated in the past had some sort of point-usually for marketing purposes. They wanted to
know what sort of dishwasher you have, which political candidate you prefer, or how...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Newsflash to Christmas marketers: It's still summer
September 17, 2007
Four days after Labor Day, the first Christmas catalog showed up in my mailbox. Four. Days. After. Labor. Day. Sometimes,
all you can do is shake your head. Now, don't get me wrong. I love Christmas. I start looking forward to Christmas every Dec.
26. I am a bona fide, certified Yuletide nut. That does not, however, mean I wish to "get a jump" on my Christmas shopping,
as the catalog advised. Jump? JUMP? This isn't a jump. This is...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: The World of Tomorrow hovers, prepares to land
August 20, 2007
It's a hovercraft, the M200G from the fine folks at Moller International of Davis, Calif. It has eight rotary engines that
create enough oomph to lift the thing about 10 feet in the air, just high enough to zoom over traffic and crack your head
on a stoplight. Which, let's face it, would add a much-needed element of comedy to the average morning commute. But anyway,
about the car: It's about time. I've been waiting for this thing since I...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Working from home not all Sprite and Cheetos
July 16, 2007
Being selfemployed and working at home is usually a pretty good deal. You set your own hours and your own dress code (you
haven't seen Casual Friday until you've seen Home Office Casual Friday). Snack time is never far away. And if you need to
take a break for the 4 p.m. showing of "Hong Kong Phooey" on the Boomerang channel, well, who's to stop you? But that's not
to say it's all Sprite and Cheetos. I'm thinking of vacations....
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Biz buzz like "at the end of the day" puts me at the end of my rope
June 18, 2007
As part of my ongoing search for things to make fun of, I've spent the last few years collecting Business Buzzwords-Biz Buzz,
if you will. I now know why they're called buzzwords: Because if you read or hear more than two or three in a single sen tence,
you feel a buzzing sensation in the back of your skull. Followed shortly thereafter by a full-blown migraine. That is precisely
what happened to me after receiving an e-mail in which two...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: A sensible airline's rules to fly the friendly skies
May 21, 2007
We're heading into the Summer Travel Season, and travel this year likely will be even more ridiculous than usual. Gasoline
will be more expensive, traffic will be heavier, roads will be messier. Tempers will flare and danger will lurk at every intersection.
And that's just driving across town to pick up those spare suitcases from Mom. In this country, we are given two choices for
summer travel, driving or flying. The train is kind of a non-starter, which is a...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: New plate options better than the 'Wander' years
April 16, 2007
The state of Indiana (For Sale Or Lease: Ask Mitch About A Privatization Plan To Suit You And Your Budget) came up with four
proposed designs for license plates, and you know, they didn't look half bad. In fact, all four were fairly attractive. Which,
of course, leaves us to ask, "How did that happen?" Let's face it: This state hasn't had a greatlooking license plate since
... well, ever. From the minimalist plates of my youth, blue and maroon...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Indiana's rural counties fall short of 'progressive'
March 19, 2007
I notice that my home county, LaGrange, did not make Progressive Farmer magazine's 2007 list of Top 10 Rural Counties in America.
Then again, "progressive" is not a word that leaps to mind for a county that is about 40-percent Amish. Actually, none of
Indiana's 92 counties made the Top 10. According to the magazine, the best rural places to live in America are (in reverse
order): 10. Polk County, N.C.; 9. Amador County, Calif.; 8. Garfield County, Okla.; 7....
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Forget Elvis on velvet; Art Bullies have other plans
January 15, 2007
I've seen the picture of the proposed ginormous art installation for downtown, and I think I speak for many of us when I say
... Well, come to think of it, I better not say that, seeing as how many of us do not use that kind of language. In case you
missed it, here's the deal: There's a movement afoot to erect a large, circular, steel, Dairy Queen curlicue over at 11th
and West streets-a $10 million large, circular,...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Holiday favorites-and not-so-favorites-liven up work
December 18, 2006
On the first day of Christmas, the workplace brought to me: One allegedly funny memo written in the style of Clement Clarke
Moore: "'Twas the night before Christmas and all through Accounts Receivable, not a creature was stirring, isn't that unbelievable?"
It goes on like this for 27 stanzas, representing at least four hours of someone's workweek. On the second day of Christmas,
the workplace brought to me: Two half-gallon cartons of eggnog for the kitchenette refrigerator, where they will...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Being your own boss doesn't save you from idiots
November 20, 2006
I work at home. Well, I call it work, but really it's just sitting around making fun of things. Which is the same "job" description
I used when I "worked" (boy, this is going to date me) at what used to be known as The Daily Newspaper. Nowadays, it's The
Manually Delivered User Operated Lifestyle Enhancement Information Platform. Anyway, the good thing about doing whatever I
do at home is that I'm free from the tyrannies of the workplace-meetings, idiot...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Planetary restructuring hits Pluto where it hurts
September 4, 2006
Poor Pluto. One day it was spinning through the galaxy, meandering around the sun at a stately 248.54 Earth years per lap,
rotating in the wrong direction as compared to the other planets, minding its own business, and then-Bam! It got downsized,
reclassified as a planetelle or planetina or planette, whatever they've decided to call it. Reminds me of some businesses
I know. One day everything's A-OK, to use space parlance. Next thing you know, Pluto is putting all the...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Land sakes! State Fair celebrates farms of all sizes
August 21, 2006
I take a back seat to no one in my love of the Indiana State Fair. I haven't missed one in about 35 years-including those
years when the fair seemed outmoded, doomed to go the way of the Model T and the icebox. I was there when it struggled through
the Injun Andy mascot debacle, the concerts with attendance numbering in the dozens, and the shocking revelation that elephant
ears did not come from actual elephants. And so I have...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Customer service may be modern-day fairytale
July 17, 2006
Gather 'round, kids. Let me tell you a little story about how things work nowadays. Or maybe how they don't. Once upon a time,
there was a customer named Mike. He had two accounts with a credit card company known as-well, let's just say it's the card
you don't want to leave home without, according to the TV commercials. Mike had recently closed one of the accounts, with
a balance due of about $100. However, he left the other account...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Do you fake it? You're not alone in the excuse biz
June 19, 2006
Being self-employed -a term I prefer to "being a guy who sits around the house in sloppy clothes, unshaven, making fun of
things"-I worry that I might have trouble adjusting, were I to go back to an office job. Would I fit in? Would I be able to
get along with people? And most important, would I be able to come up with convincing excuses when I am scamming a day off
by calling in sick on a lovely day...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: 'Restart Your Engines'-we have refrigerator magnets
May 15, 2006
I'm not sensing a lot of enthusiasm for the state's new tourism slogan, "Restart Your Engines." Wait. What am I saying? What
I sense is some outright hostility because the state paid $85,000 for this clunker, then was so tone deaf as to unveil it
right after the income tax deadline, setting off a wave of "Your tax dollars at work" jokes in newspapers, blogs and coffee
shops. So here we are in May, at the start of another tourist...
MoreFUNNY BUSINESS: Spare me from the dreaded brown-bag lunch
April 17, 2006
All right, boys and girls, what are we to make of the survey that says worker morale in America is tanking? Harris Interactive
conducted the survey for staffing agency Randstad and came up with figures showing only 40 percent of employees said morale
at their workplace was good or excellent, down from 44 percent a year ago. This, of course, raises the question: How did it
get so high to begin with? I see little good coming from this survey....
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In my opinion the estridge companies are crooks. They filed bankruptcy on their 'track housing' side of the business two weeks before they closed on one of my clients' homes. When my client first interviewed Estridge as a builder 6 months before, they specifically ASKED about the solvency of their business, knowing that some builders were struggling. Estridge truly misrepresented their financial situation at that time. I suppose I am more unhappy with the whole system than I am with the builder because what the heck==you can file bankruptcy on 'track homes' but still keep building and make money off of 'custom built' homes??? How ridiculous! They are all homes. How can a company be allowed to bilk thousands of dollars from their subcontractors but still be allowed to build houses?? they should have been made to pay back all their unpaid contractors before being allowed to profit from building any more houses! This alone makes them and the system crooks in my eyes. I would never build an estridge home and I would not recommend for my clients either. If they were truly 'bankrupt' how could they afford to keep building homes anyway??? The whole system needs fixed.
I live a couple blocks east of the Angie's campus and my house is assessed for ~$160,000. If I could get that amount, let alone $384,000 (a 140% bonus), I'd sell in a minute. Either Angie's stockholders just got fleeced, or Angie's is getting about a 58% discount on their property taxes, if these properties are actually worth what they paid Mr. Oesterle for them. Which do you think is the case?
Perhaps the IMA board is really to blame! They agreed to hire Charles. They can't seemingly find donors among themselves, or bring in new blood that will support the museums operating budget with an expanded museum and money to provide curators with something to do (ie buy art). The headlines of disarray at the museum and mass firings are hurting the reputation of the museum for some time to come. If people on the board had misgivings, perhaps they shpuld have more forcefully opposed efforts that they have seemingly been unable to fund, like expansion and the costs it has created!
See, I told u Indyman and Dipsicle....this 8 days is overkill. It's barely worth a weekend....great job Tony George! Your dream has been fulfilled....he fans want the I r l back. Thats how good it was.....and that sucked.
I have been in training for a short time now but right off I can see that safety and quality are the number one issues, my experience as of late has been a positive one, the employees along with Jeff the plant manager and the operation supervisor as well as the engineers are a highly motivated group of people, what an asset for the area to have and for company's in need of a quality metal products.