New 'Spider-man' not so amazing

July 3, 2012
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Haven't ranted about many movies lately mostly because I haven't been to many.

But I did catch "The Amazing Spider-Man, a film so overpacked with coincidences and writer-rigged plotting that I didn't believe a second of it and was bugged by most of it.

The fact that Andrew Garfield and Emma Stone are very good actors make the film they are stuck in even more annoying.

Trust me, I have no trouble buying a web-shooting super hero. I didn't worship or mind the one made 10 years ago. And I'm not objecting to unnecessary remakes because little that Hollywood does is necessary. (Keep in mind that Frederic March won an Oscar for "Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde" only about a decade after John Barrymore made his film version--and about a decade before Spencer Tracy had at the role.)

What I have trouble with is "oh come on" moments at nearly every plot turn.

I have trouble buying a high school student getting a positions of great responsibility in a high-tech, experiment-heavy company.

I have trouble with the fact that said company barely has a security system or even video cameras monitoring its experiments.

I have trouble that, right in the middle of a work space, there's loud science-for-beginners displays for the benefit of tour groups.

I have trouble believing a high school kid can have the crap beat out of him in front of an entire student body without anyone saying anything or his family pressing charges at the same school where a student gets his parents (well, uncle) called because he slam dunked a ball and broke a backboard.

I have trouble with a student body not awed by a guy who suddenly leaps fourteen feet in the air for the aforementioned dunk.

I have trouble with a giant lizard attack witnessed by hundreds of people being reported as a rumor.

I have trouble with fire-escape access New York City windows without locks.

I have trouble with time bombs that not only have conveniently visible numeric displays but also a helpful voice to tell you how close to your doom you are.

And I'm tired of writers relying on Emma Stone's hesitant charms to carry scenes.

"The Amazing Spider-Man" is like radio commentators who are just concerned with the impact of what they are saying right now, regardless of whether it makes any sense or connects to what happened moments ago or what happens next.

All of which wouldn't be so much of a problem if "The Amazing Spider-Man" was fun and/or original. 

Now where's Batman?

Your thoughts? 

  • Another mindless film
    These super hero films appear to be aimed at a young and naive audience, so plot holes aren't a concern. It would be nice if Hollywood spent a few million less on special efx and a few hundred thousand more on writers who can can come up with interesting movie plots, but it appears efx sell a lot of tickets.
    • Go see other movies!
      If you haven't seen "The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel" or "Moonrise Kingdom" go before they're gone. "Moonrise Kingdom" is extremely quirky which might bother some, but "The Best Exotic..." is just a wonderful cast of well seasoned British actors having a ball in a strange exotic place.
    • Supervising Art Director's Sexual Battery Case
      This film's supervising art director accused of sexual assault, libel and malcious prosecution of his trangender LA Music Award winning singer victim:
    • Different set of problems
      I guess I'm not a movie critic because I can usually look past these kinds of plot holes. I liked the casting choices in this film better than the Toby Maguire version, but I found the film to be slow. The "original" film version was more exciting because Spidey fans had been waiting. Now we have something to compare it to, and it's better in some ways and worse in others. I liked it better than Lou, but it didn't knock my socks off.
    • Well...
      ... I think you are being WAYYY too critical. It is, afterall, a super-hero movie, not Kramer vs. Kramer. I enjoyed the movie for exactly what it was.
    • Spider Kramer
      Whether it's Spidey or Kramer, it's still up to the filmmakers to create a buy-able world. A few such problems are excusable for me. When they stack up this high, it blocks the entertainment...and I didn't even mention the cranes. And, as I said, they wouldn't have been as much of a problem for me if the film was more fun and/or original. --Lou
    • MacGuffin
      I liked the movie and didn't mind the plot holes, but in the end I was bothered by how the totally manufactured climax mirrored the equally engineered ending of "The Avengers." In both movies, the heroes have to find a way to disable some doom-bringing device on top of a New York skyscraper. They're just hollow excuses to stage a big fight, and gin up big consequences that have little to do with character development.
    • comic movies
      i liked this movie. my son liked it better than the older spider man. Sally Feild and Martin Sheen are much better actors. I love Martin Sheen. I like what he stands for. Was watching him on PBS the show was Empowering Minds he was great. I hope they come out with another spiderman soon.

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